Pumpkin

Name: Pumpkin
Location: NC

Pumpkin would make a villain worthy of the badass heroes and heroines of the Goddesses Rising books by Natalie Damschroder. That is, if Pumpkin weren’t too self-involved to try to take over the world.

What makes Pumpkin so mean?

Pumpkin is like Garfield’s evil twin. She is so fat that she can barely clean her own dingleberries off her fur and rarely gives the fur she can reach a good bath. She’s rather greasy.

She likes to get up in her feeding slave’s face and meow obnoxiously until fed. Her human (aka feeding slave and pooper scooper) has to feign sleep in order to avoid Pumpkin’s bad feline breath in her face at 6 am. If Pumpkin is not served on time or does not like the food put in her bowl, she will get revenge by pooping on the floor.

Pumpkin also has a hissing problem, terrible cat food breath, and a habit of swatting at people. She occasionally tries to bite. Her human tried to help her with her weight and self-esteem issues by putting her on an expensive kitty diet, but Pumpkin gained all the lost weight back as soon as the food was changed back to the regular stuff.

Another one of Pumpkin’s hobbies is leaving behind clumps of fur all over the drapes, chairs, and bedding. She has her human slave well-trained to serve her demanding whims.

Pumpkin lives with Twinkie.

Photo submitted by: Sandi

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